MacComedy

Apple is hosting a special media event at 1 p.m. EDT today in regards to a software update about the iPhone.  Here are the Top 10 rumors regarding what features this update will include.

Visit will upgrade his Reality Distortion Field, clearing way for enslavement of humankind in 2012. Apple CEO Steve Jobs will not be the keynote speaker at MacWorld Expo 2009 due to a return trip to his home planet in the Draco constellation to prepare for the alien takeover of Earth on December 21, 2012.

iPhone activation will also require a lifetime contract. Recent reports indicate that Wal-Mart’s 4,000 stores will begin selling a 512MB version of the iPhone for just $12 starting the day after Christmas, December 26 — also known as Return All the Crap You Got the Day Before Day and Boxing Day.

Free copies of Windows Vista and MMS-enabled iPhones just some of the deals Like many retailers, Apple will be offering some fantastic deals to Black Friday shoppers that are already lining up at Apple Stores across the country. Forget 5 to 10 percent discounts.  Phil Schiller, Apple Senior Vice President of Worldwide Product Marketing, says [...]